Premiere Championship Wrestling
Presents:
PCW FEVER!!!
Venue:
Cow Palace, San Francisco
Commentators:
Justin Walker, Alyssa Graham, Neil Coles
(Show
opens in the arena, where the crowd of about 10,000 is cheering wildly as
pyrotechnics go off at the entrance way.
The camera pans over the crowd, then switches over to the ringside
broadcast table, where our three commentators sit. In the middle is Justin
Walker, the play-by-play man. To his left his Neil Coles, the color
commentator. To Walker’s right is the lovely Alyssa Graham, also a color
commentator and the expert on the happenings in the promotion’s women’s
division.)
JW: Good evening, fans and welcome to our first
installment of PCW Fever, the weekly show of the recently created Premiere
Championship Wrestling!! I’m Justin Walker, along with my partners in crime,
Neil Coles (Neil does a Larry Zybsko-like salute) and Alyssa Graham. We hope to give you the best in wrestling
action every week!
NC:
…or whenever the Greater Power feels like having a card!
JW:
Shush, Neil. Anyway, tonight begins the
history of PCW, and with that, we have four tournaments beginning tonight!
AG:
That’s right, we have the first matches of the tournaments to decide the PCW
World Heavyweight Champion, World Tag Team Champions, the Cruiserweight Champ,
and the Women’s champion all here tonight on Fever!
JW:
The finals for these tournaments will be held at our upcoming pay-per-view
entitled… “Title Pending?” Am I reading
this right? (hands a sheet to Alyssa)
AG:
(reading) That’s what it says…
NC: Best pay-per-view title I’ve ever
heard. Sure beats the hell out of
“Armageddon” or “Hardcore
Heaven.”
JW:
Well fans, we’re about ready for the first match of the Heavyweight tournament,
so let’s—
(Queen’s
“I Want it All” starts up as a rather short man in medieval attire comes from
behind the curtains carrying a roll of carpet.
He places it down near the entrance to the arena and unrolls it,
revealing a red carpet. He unrolls the
carpet all the way to the ring area and then runs back to the curtains.)
NC:
What the hell is this?!
JW:
I think I have an idea…
(The
man opens the curtains, allowing for the wrestler known as Prince Master to
enter the arena, wearing elaborate robes.
His three lackeys, Trickster, Taurus, and Steel Eagle follow him. Taurus and S. Eagle flank Master to his left
and right, while Trickster is behind. Meanwhile, the crowd is booing.)
NC:
Oh it’s him.
AG:
PCW’s resident asshole has entered the building.
JW:
Well he has all reason to be here. He
has a matchup against Diego David Tarquez coming up.
(Master
et. al enter the ring. Trickster
snatches the microphone from the ring announcer and hands it to Prince Master,
who unbuttons his robe and smirks at the booing fans.)
P.Master:
Yes, yes… I just KNOW how much you all love your oh-so-wonderful Prince!
(The
boos become louder.)
P.Master: Well, my adoring *subjects*, tonight begins my quest for the PCW World Title, a title that is my God-given right to own. And I will triumph! For I, Prince Master, am so much better than ANY of those no-talented losers in the back!
(The
boos continue and a chant of “Asshole” begins.)
P.Master: Silence, infidels!!! (the boos and chants
get louder) Don’t you peons have any
respect for royalty?!
Commentators:
(in unison) No.
(Master’s
lackeys hop onto a turnbuckle each, trying to intimidate the crowd into
shutting up.)
P.Master:
Now let’s go on to my opponent for tonight, a mister Diego David Tarquez. How can someone or my breeding, someone of
my status, be forced to take on some dirty, filthy, Ricky Martin wannabe?!
(The
boos continue.)
P.Master:
Tonight, unwashed masses, you will see excellence in action as I take DDT and
give him a beating that he will NEVER forget!
Now hit this loser’s music!!
(“Livin’
La Vida Loca” by Ricky Martin starts up as Diego David Tarquez, runs to the
ring and slides in.)
NC:
Master was right! He is a Ricky Martin wannabe!
JW:
He’s also pissed!
(DDT
hits Master’s lackeys with clotheslines, knocking them out of the ring. He then turns to Master, who promptly drops
to his knees and begins to beg. The
crowd is cheering.)
DING,
DING, DING!!
JW:
The bell has rung to start this first round match and Tarquez is backing Master
into a corner!
AG:
Gee, and I thought royalty didn’t need to beg.
JW:
DDT now grabbing Prince Master by the head and—
NC:
(cringes) Oww…
JW:
Low blow by Master!!
AG:
That jerk!
JW: Master back up now and he tosses DDT into
the turnbuckle shoulder-first! He has
him again, and a belly-to-back suplex by Prince Master!
AG:
He may be a complete asshole, but Master does know his way around the ring.
JW:
The Prince with a cover and DDT quickly kicks out! He needs to recover from that surprise assault from Master, who
is now taking off his robe. Tarquez
back up, and a forearm on Prince Master, followed by another, Master into the ropes…and a shoulderblock by
DDT! DDT into the ropes now, leaps over
Master…he’s back up now and they hit each other with a clothesline!
NC:
Come on, Diego! Let’s see those moves
of your namesake!
JW:
Yes, Tarquez is known for his mastery of several types of DDTs, but we haven’t
seen any of them yet in this match.
Meanwhile, Master with a dropkick on Tarquez, and he falls through the
ropes to the outside!
AG:
Dangerous place for him now. Master’s
lackeys are out there.
JW:
And they’re beating on him now! Prince
Master has the ref distracted! And an
atomic drop by Steel Eagle on Tarquez!
AG:
Wasn’t this supposed to be a singles match?
NC:
Yeah, but they’re evil, so they get to break the rules!
AG:
Oh.
JW:
The lackeys toss DDT back into the ring…Master with a quick cover...1…2… and
Tarquez with a shoulder up! Prince
picks him up again and tosses him into the ropes…Master with a back body—DDT BY
DIEGO DAVID TARQUEZ!
NC:
There ya go!
JW:
Diego David Tarquez countered the backdrop in mid-air and turned it into an
impressive DDT! Now what’s he doing?
(DDT
stands over the downed Prince Master and begins dancing.)
NC:
He’s shaking his bon-bon, Justin!
JW:
Legdrop by DDT…turns it into a cover…and Prince Master kicks out at two! What would you call that move?
AG:
I think he calls it the Bon-Bon Legdrop, but I’m not sure.
NC:
At least it wasn’t a People’s Elbow…
JW:
And now Master with a body slam on Tarquez…he’s going up top…kneedrop from the
top…and Master missed!!
AG: That’s gotta hurt…
JW:
DDT picks him up…and a reverse DDT by the DDT man himself!! That could do
it! 1…2…and he kicks out at 2 and a
half!
AG:
So close!
JW:
Tarquez getting a few stomps in on Master…
(The
man from earlier comes down to ringside.)
NC:
Not him again…
AG:
Something’s up here…
JW:
Master into the ropes, and Diego David Tarquez got him with a powerslam!! 1…2…and the Prince kicks out again!
(The
man hops onto the ring apron and gets the ref’s attention. In the ring, DDT
sets up Master for his finisher, the Cuban Stinger (Diamond Cutter). The crowd stands up and cheers wildly.)
JW:
Tarquez has Master set up for his finishing maneuver…and Taurus comes in and
clobbers him from behind!!
NC:
And the ref didn’t see it at all!!
JW:
TAURUS STUNNER!!! (Stunner-like move done facing opponent; a Bareback) Taurus
nailed DDT with his move!!
(Taurus
rolls out the ring and the medieval man hops off the apron. The ref turns around to see Prince Master
covering DDT.)
JW:
Master with the cover…1…2…3!
AG:
What a way to win a match.
(“I
Want it All” starts up again as the fans boo.)
Ring
Announcer: HERE IS YOUR WINNER… PRINCE MASTER!!!
JW:
And Prince Master advances to the next round…
AG:
Much to the dismay of the 10,000 fans here in the Cow Palace.
(Master
leaves the ring, followed by Steel Eagle, Trickster, and the medieval man.
Taurus, however, stays in the ring.)
JW:
Next up is also a match in the heavyweight tournament. Taurus, who is already
in the ring, will face off against The Journeyman. The winner of this match will face Prince Master in the next
round.
AG:
Wouldn’t it be funny to see Prince Master have to face his own lackey?
JW:
It certainly would be interesting to watch.
NC:
Bleh, Master would just pay Taurus off to make him take a dive!
(“Bittersweet
Symphony” by the Verve starts up.)
Ring
Announcer: THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS A FIRST ROUND MATCH IN THE PCW WORLD TITLE
TOURNAMENT AND IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!!
INTRODUCING FIRST, ALREADY IN THE RING, FROM MEXICO CITY, MEXICO AND
WEIGHING IN AT 230 POUNDS, TAURUS!!
(Taurus
raises his arms up in the air as the fans boo.)
Ring
Announcer: AND HIS OPPONENT, COMING FROM THE HIGHWAY, WEIGHING 240 POUNDS, THE
JOURNEYMAN!!
(The
Journeyman makes his way to the ring, wearing his trenchcoat. He bumps into a few PCW personnel on his way
to the ring.)
JW:
The Journeyman, fans… an interesting character indeed.
AG:
Not every day you get to see a wrestler purposely knock down everyone in his
path to the ring…
DING,
DING, DING!!
JW:
And we’re underway with our second first round match of the night… lockup in
the center of the ring… Taurus turns it into a hammerlock…Journeyman with a
back elbow, and Taurus breaks the hold to dodge the attack… and he nails him
with a dropkick!
AG:
Taurus is a luchador-style wrestler, so expect some high-risk moves from him in
this match.
JW:
Speaking of high risk, after this match, we have the first match of the
Cruiserweight tournament between Kenshiro Tanaka and Chris Lei. Meanwhile,
Journeyman’s back up and has Taurus in a side headlock….Taurus pushes him off,
but the Journeyman nails him with a running lariat as he comes back!
NC:
That nut still has that trenchcoat on!
How can anyone wrestle with that thing on?
JW:
Well, he is and he’s not having any problems as he delivers a leg drop on
Taurus…cover, and Taurus quickly gets the shoulder up! Journeyman now trying to choke him…but the
ref quickly makes him break the hold.
AG:
Come on, ref! Let him choke Master’s
stooge out!
NC:
He’s just trying to call it down the middle, Alyssa-babe.
AG:
Never call me that again, Neil…
JW:
Will you two chill?! I thought Akira
and that sailor girl were bad…
NC
and AG: WHO?!
JW:
My two fellow commentators at my last place of work…anyway, Taurus into the
ropes…Journeyman with a tilt-whirl…and Taurus counters with a flying head
scissors! Here comes Taurus again and The Journeyman nails him with a
tilt-a-whirl backbreaker!
AG:
Got him that time!
JW:
Journeyman with a cover again..1… 2… and Taurus kicks out! Journeyman picks him up now… Taurus into the
rope…kick to the midsection by Journeyman… he runs into the ropes and a
impressive bulldog by the Journeyman!
He’s going up top now…
(While
on the top rope, The Journeyman takes off the trenchcoat, showing that he has
no shirt on underneath. The women in the crowd begin to cheer a little louder.)
AG:
And now he’s taking off that coat!
NC:
You can start drooling now, Alyssa.
AG:
Shut up!
JW:
Journeyman with a guillotine leg drop…he gets nothing!!
NC:
Taurus stood up just in time on that one!
JW:
Taurus with a dropkick on the sitting Journeyman…and now he’s going up top…and
a guillotine leg drop by Taurus!
NC:
Now THAT’S how you hit a guillotine leg drop!
Taurus perfected that move!
JW:
Taurus with a cover, he could win it now! 1…2…thr—NO!! Journeyman with a shoulder up at the last
second!
NC:
That was a three-count!
AG:
No it wasn’t! Ref’s calling it down the middle, like you said, Neil.
NC:
Whatever.
JW:
Taurus having some words with the referee…Journeyman back up and he clobbers
Taurus from behind! Taurus into the
ropes…back drop by Journeyman…
(Taurus
lands feet first after the backdrop and superkicks The Journeyman. The smack from the hit can be heard
throughout the arena.)
JW:
Superkick by Taurus! What a move!
NC:
Journeyman got hit good by that one! He
may need to find his jaw after that!
JW:
Taurus pulling Journeyman out of the corner…kick to the midsection…TAURUS—NO!!!
The Journeyman countered with a clothesline!!
AG:
Impressive counter there by The Journeyman.
JW:
And Taurus is shocked! Journeyman now has him in a front chancre…DDT!!
NC:
No, he was out here earlier…
JW:
I meant the move, Neil…He calls it The End of the Road…he covers…1…2…and this
one is over!
DING
DING DING!!
(Crowd
cheers as “Bittersweet Symphony” starts up.)
Ring
Announcer: HERE IS YOUR WINNER, THE JOURNEYMAN!!
(Journeyman
has his hand raised and then makes his way backstage, grabbing his coat along
the way. Suddenly, Diego David Tarquez
runs into the ring.)
JW:
It’s DDT!!
NC:
But the match is over, Justin..
JW:
I mean the wrestler!! And he’s going
after Taurus…
NC:
Look out!
JW:
CUBAN STINGER!! DIEGO TARQUEZ GOT HIM WITH THE CUBAN STINGER!!
AG:
I guess that was payback for Taurus costing DDT the match earlier!
JW:
Let’s go backstage for a moment. I hear Monty Washington has found Kenshiro
Tanaka…
*-*-*-*
(Monty
Washington is standing in front of a backdrop with the PCW logo on it. Next to him is the Silent Assassin, Kenshiro
Tanaka.)
MW:
Kenshiro, do you have any comments about your match with Chris Lei coming up,
which is part of the PCW Cruiserweight title tournament?
Kenshiro:
…
MW:
Mr. Tanaka?
Kenshiro:
…
(Kenshiro
swings his kendo stick at Monty, stopping it just inches from his face. Monty cowers, covering his face. Kenshiro then grins slightly and walks
away.)
MW:
Err… back to you, Justin…
*-*-*
JW:
Interesting comments from Kenshiro Tanaka… I think.
NC:
Wuss…
(“Kurenai”
by X-Japan starts up, with a mixed reaction.)
Ring
Announcer: THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS THE FIRST MATCH OF THE PCW CRUISERWEIGHT
TITLE TOURNAMENT AND IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!! INTRODUCING FIRST, FROM OSAKA, JAPAN, WEIGHING 195 POUNDS, HERE
IS THE SILENT ASSASSIN, KENSHIRO TANAKA!!!
(K.T.
makes his way to the ring, kendo stick in hand. He does not look at the crowd; he completely shuts them out of
his mind.)
AG:
You can tell this guy’s focused.
JW:
Kenshiro Tanaka’s just one of the four people that are vying for the PCW
Cruiserweight Title; he could be considered as one of the favorites to win this
little tournament.
NC:
Well, considering that the other three wrestlers are a kung fu loser, a
luchador pyromaniac, and a guy from “Da ‘Nolia”, that’s an easy claim to make!
(Face
pop as Priss and the Replicants’ “Konya wa Hurricane” starts up.)
NC:
Speaking of the kung fu loser…
Ring
Announcer: AND HIS OPPONENT, FROM HONG KONG, WEIGHING IN AT 210 POUNDS… CHRIS
LEI!!!!
(Chris
makes his way to the ring. Once he gets in there, he goes to the center of the
ring and does a few punches and kicks.)
NC:
I have a question. Why does a Chinese
wrestler have entrance music that’s in Japanese?
AG:
Does it matter really?
NC:
Yes it does! It makes no sense! It—
JW:
Tanaka with a dropkick from behind!!
DING,
DING, DING!!
NC:
Looks like the boy got impatient!
JW:
Guess he did, and Tanaka’s just nailing Chris Lei repeatedly with several snap
kicks!
AG:
Both of these wrestlers (if you can call them that) are accomplished martial
artists. Chris Lei has years of experience in several forms of kung fu and
other Chinese martial arts, while Kenshiro Tanaka has black belts in both
karate and jujitsu.
NC:
Someone’s been doing her homework…
JW:
Tanaka with a spin kick, but Lei ducks under it and counters with a leg
sweep! Tanaka rolls back and gets up in
a fighting stance…Lei gets into a stance too as they circle around the ring!
NC:
(in a badly dubbed voice) You think your Kung fu is better than my Kung fu? Ha!
We’ll see about that!
JW:
Very funny, Neil. Tanaka delivers a
spin kick, but Lei blocks it…Chris with a leaping spin kick, but Tanaka
dodges! Lei running over to Tanaka now,
punch by Lei, but Tanaka blocks that!
NC:
Come on! Let’s see some wrestling!!
(Chris
continues delivering punches to Kenshiro, who continues to block them with
ease.)
AG:
Well, Tanaka knows a lot of submission techniques, so we may see them in this
match.
NC:
I meant real wrestling, Alyssa, not restholds of doom!
JW:
Tanaka still blocking all of Chris Lei’s attacks…Tanaka grabs an arm…legsweep
takedown by Tanaka, but Chris Lei turns it into an armdrag!
NC:
Guh…that’s a basic move! Where’s the
power bombs and the choke slams and the vertical suplexes?!
JW:
Tanaka back up quickly…Lei going for another flying spin kick, which Tanaka
runs under and into the ropes…cross body block by Tanaka! 1…and Chris Lei
quickly kicks out!
AG:
How’s that for a wrestling move?
NC:
You don’t get it, do you? I mean REAL moves! Tombstone piledrivers, German
suplexes, backbreakers! You know what I
mean?
AG:
Yeah yeah, whatever, Neil…
JW: Lei with a kick, but Tanaka grabs the leg
and drops down into a leglock submission hold!
Impressive maneuver!
AG:
There’s one of those submission moves I was talking about. Tanaka knows several of them and can put
them on his opponent at anytime!
NC:
Never seen that move before…
JW: Chris is now trying to reach for the ropes
with his free leg… and he gets a hold of it!
And the ref tells Kenshiro Tanaka to break the hold…Tanaka dragging Lei
near a corner... he has a hold on both legs…
(Tanaka
catapults Lei into turnbuckle, but Chris lands on the first turnbuckle and
leaps off, nailing Kenshiro with a spinning leg lariat.)
JW:
What a counter by Chris Lei!
AG:
That looked like a modified version of his Lei Kick!
NC:
Yawn…
JW:
This match has been full of counters and dodges! Chris Lei with a cover on Tanaka, but he quickly gets a shoulder
up! Lei back up now…Tanaka flips back onto his feet… Lei into the ropes…
(Tanaka
jumps, expecting to leap frog over the charging Lei, but Chris stops behind
him.)
NC:
Tanaka got suckered!
JW:
Lei tapping his shoulder now…Tanaka ducks under a clothesline…Lei turning back
around…superkick by Kenshiro, but Chris ducks under that…
AG:
He missed the Silencer! (Kenshiro’s superkick finisher)
JW:
Chris Lei from behind with a reverse facelock!
This may be a reverse DDT…
(Kenshiro
bend his legs and springs up into the air, landing on his feet behind Lei with
reverse facelock on him.)
NC:
What was that?!
AG:
He countered the move with one of his own!
NC:
How in the hell did he do that?!
JW:
Tanaka locks in a dragon sleeper!! He sits down with it! This may be all for Chris Lei!
NC:
He ain’t getting out of that! Perfect
placement in the middle of the ring by Tanaka makes it impossible for Chris to
reach the ropes!
JW:
Lei trying to hold out for as long as he can… the ref’s checking on him…he’s
tapping out!! Chris Lei has tapped out!
DING,
DING, DING!!
(Mixed
reaction as “Kurenai” starts up again.
Tanaka still has the dragon sleeper locked on Lei.)
Ring
Announcer: HERE IS YOUR WINNER,
KENSHIRO TANAKA!!!
(Kenshiro
lets go of the hold and exits the ring, grabbing his kendo stick on the way.)
JW:
Impressive win by Kenshiro Tanaka! He
will now advance to the finals of this tournament to face the winner of the
match between Pyrotechnico and Wade Phillips!
NC:
I still want to know how in the hell did Tanaka do that move! That defied all the laws of physics! Can we see that replay again?!
(Cut
to a replay of Kenshiro spring into the air, flip over Chris Lei, land behind
him, still holding onto him, and lock the dragon sleeper on him.)
JW:
Well there you see it, fans. That “physically impossible” counter, as Neil
Coles calls it.
NC:
I’m gonna learn to do that, dammit!
AG:
Well, I’m sure Mr. Tanaka would love to teach you how, Neil.
NC:
No way! I might get beat down if I tried!
JW:
Well, fans, it’s time for the first match in our Tag Team title
tournament. We have seven teams
participating in this. The Mad Boyz
drew a bye for the first round and will face the winners of this upcoming match
between the Southside Soldiers and the OnnaTarashi.
NC:
The who?
(Suddenly,
Two-Mix’s “White Reflection” starts up.
The crowd cheers wildly as Kisara Velaquez makes her way down to the
ring. Since she is wearing civilian clothes, it seems that she is not here to
wrestle.)
NC:
What the hell is she doing here?!
JW:
I don’t know, but she’s not on my format!
(Kisara
takes a seat next to Alyssa and grabs an extra headset.)
JW:
Well, fans, I’m guessing we have a guest commentator with us now. We welcome
Kisara Velaquez to our ringside position.
KV:
Thanks, Justin.
JW:
What brings you here tonight?
KV:
Well, my sister-in-law, Julie, is in action tonight in the Women’s tournament,
so I thought I come and cheer her on.
JW:
But her match is after this one. Why are you here now?
KV:
Well…erm…because of the OnnaTarashi. (laughs a bit)
NC:
I should’ve known. I always heard that
Kisara was a fan of the pretty ones…
KV:
Shut up, Neil, before I make you eat the chair you’re sitting on!
Voice
over the PA: SOUTH-SIIIIIIIIIIDE!!!!
(“Watch
for the Hook” by Cool Breeze starts up.)
Ring
Announcer: THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS PART OF THE PCW TAG TEAM TITLE TOURNAMENT
AND IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!! INTRODUCING FIRST, BEING ACCOMPANIED TO THE
RING BY ICEPICK, FROM ATLANTA, GEORGIA, AT A TOTAL COMBINED WEIGHT OF 485
POUNDS, HERE ARE THE SOUTHSIDE SOLDIERS!!
(The
Soldiers, Magnum and AK-47, make their way to the ring. Behind them is their manager, Icepick.)
NC:
Oh look, it’s the team formerly known as the Westside Soldiers!
AG:
Why did they change?
NC:
West Coast rap got whack.
KV:
The team used to be Icepick and Magnum, but Icepick sustained a severe leg
injury about a year ago, which ended his career as a wrestler.
JW: Yeah, I heard about that…
(“Watch
for the Hook” fades out, and is replaced by X-Japan’s “Weekend”. The fans cheer as the music starts up.)
Ring
Announcer: AND THEIR OPPONENTS, FROM KYOTO, JAPAN, AT A TOTAL COMBINED WEIGHT
OF 445 POUNDS, HERE ARE TAMAHORI AND KAMUI, THE ONNATARASHI!!
(The
OnnaTarashi (Japanese for Ladykillers) come from behind the curtains and pose
near the entrance as pyrotechnics go off behind them. They then make their way to the ring. Tamahori, the smaller one, stops near a woman in the crowd who is
along the aisle and kisses her hand.
The female fan promptly faints.
As he approaches the ring, Kisara takes a look at him.)
KV:
Why does he look so familiar?
(As
Tamahori and Kamui enter the ring, they go into the center and pose all
bishounen-like, getting loud cheers and screams from the women in the
crowd. However, the pose looks all too
familiar to Kisara.)
KV:
(a tad pissed) That’s… Akira’s pose…
AG:
You mean that’s Akira Velaquez?
KV:
(gaining composure) Yeah, you didn’t know?
Others:
Nope.
KV:
What kind of people are you?! Especially Justin! You’ve worked with the guy
before!
AG:
You mean you didn’t know he was gonna be here?
KV:
No, he was supposed to be in Japan!
(Tamahori
puts on a mask to cover and protect his “beautiful” face. He poses once more, getting another face pop
from the fans, and gets ready for the match.
AK-47 is on the other side of the ring, having a chat with his partner.)
JW:
Well fans, we have just been told that Tamahori is actually former NPWA
superstar Akira Velaquez, who used to wrestle in several independent promotions
around the world and is a resident of San Francisco.
It
looks like he and AK-47 will be starting off this match…
DING,
DING, DING!!
JW:
And here we go with this tag team tournament bout! Lockup… AK-47 turns it into a side headlock, Tama picks up AK for
a belly to back…and AK-47 counters with a headlock takedown!
KV:
Akira—I mean, Tamahori (rolls her eyes) was never any good in the strength
department.
JW:
Well he may be at a disadvantage in this match. AK-47 has 2 inches and 20 pounds on Tama…and AK going for a
dropkick but Tamahori got out of the way!
AK trying to get back up and Tamahori nails him with a dropkick of his
own!
(Akira—err…
Tamahori hops onto a turnbuckle and looks at the crowd through his mask,
receiving a face pop.)
NC:
Guh…I hate pretty boys.
AG:
Showboating kinda early…
KV:
He never really showboats.
JW:
Tamahori off the turnbuckle and he gets hit by a running clothesline from
AK-47!!
KV: That idiot…
JW:
Tamahori into the ropes now… AK-47 going for a back body drop…Tama going for
Rocker Dropper…AK goes through with the backdrop to counter and Tama flips back
onto his feet…only to get hit by a side kick from AK-47!! Quick cover…and Tamahori gets the shoulder
up!
AG:
Tama’s struggling early in this match…
JW: Both wrestlers make it to their corners and
tag in their partners…Kamui with a knee to the gut on Magnum…Kamui now sets him
up for a vertical suplex…and he nails it!
There’s a cover and Magnum easily kicks out.
NC:
So, Alyssa, you’re the homework girl in this trio. What’s the scoop on this
Kamui guy?
AG:
Well, Kamui is a very popular wrestler in Japan. He’s also been in a few promotions in both the States and Mexico,
but they were short stints…
(Kamui
nails a dropkick on Magnum.)
AG:
…he’s also a great technical wrestler as well as a high flyer…and—
NC:
Thank you, Alyssa.
JW: Tamahori tagged in now… Kamui whips Magnum
into the ropes… back body drop by Kamui…Tama’s over there now…standing
moonsault by Velaquez!!
KV:
Tamahori, Justin…
JW:
--I mean Tamahori… either way, Magnum kicked out at 2! Tama back up…and he’s taken back down by
Magnum with a drop toe hold….and turns it into a submission hold, working on
the knee and ankle!
KV:
Smart move by Magnum. My brother’s a
high flyer, but you can’t do it without a good pair of legs.
AG:
And Magnum’s taking out one of them with that anklelock submission.
JW:
Tamahori now trying to reach the ropes to break the hold…and he got it! The
ref’s telling Magnum to break the hold…Magnum dragging Tama from the ropes and
picks him up… whip into the ropes….and a big spinebuster by Magnum!! What
impact!!
KV:
Power moves also work on Tamahori.
JW:
Cover by Magnum and Tama gets the shoulder up!
Magnum gets a hold of his legs…and slingshots him into his corner! AK-47
going up to the top, grabs Tama..
AG:
This is gonna hurt…
JW:
TORNADO DDT BY AK-47!!
KV:
(shakes her head)
NC:
Tamahori just got nailed by the AK-47!!
JW:
Magnum now over to cover! 1…2…and a save by Kamui!!
KV:
The ref should not have let that happen.
AK-47 wasn’t the legal man.
JW:
Tama whipped into the ropes again—reversal…Magnum ducks under a
clothesline…he’s coming back now…superkick by Tamahori!
NC:
Look at those teeth fly!
KV:
I see that he keeps the Akira Kick…
AG:
He calls it the Bishounen Kick now.
KV:
Oh god…
JW:
Tamahori up top now…and a shooting star press by Tamahori! There’s a cover…and
AK-47 makes the save! Tama back up and he misses a superkick! AK-47 ducks
under… South Side Kick (jumping side kick) by AK-47!!
NC:
The move formerly known as the West Side Kick!
JW: Icepick on the apron now, distracting the
ref! Magnum hauling Tamahori up…AK-47
into the ropes
AG:
This looks like a Drive-By!
JW: Tama with a victory roll and AK-47 missed
the West Side Kick!! There’s no ref as
Tama has the cover!
(Kamui
knocks AK-47 out of the ring with a spinning leg lariat and then grabs the
attention of the referee.)
JW:
Ref’s over there now…1…2…thr—NO!!! Magnum kicks out!
AG:
He had all the time in the world to kick out!
JW:
Kamui going back to his corner now…Tama working on Magnum with some martial
arts kicks and whips him into the turnbuckle…Kamui going to the top…Tama’s
setting Magnum up for something…
(Kamui
wraps his legs around Magnum’s head as AK-47 gets back on the apron.)
JW:
Tama with an elbow on AK! And a
top-rope Frankensteiner by Kamui!
Tamahori into the ropes…here he comes…rolling somersault senton by
Tamahori!! Impressive!
AG:
The Beautiful End is what they call that move.
KV:
I see he got rid of that stupid Akira Death Drop move. It wasn’t that bad, but it just had a horrible
name.
JW:
Tama with the cover…and this match is over!!
DING,
DING, DING!!!
(“Weekend”
starts up again, followed by a huge face pop.)
Ring
Announcer: HERE ARE YOUR WINNERS…. THE ONNATARASHI!!!
(The
Southside Soldiers make their way backstage as the OnnaTarashi celebrate their
win.)
JW:
And the OnnaTarashi win this match and advance to the next round of the tag
team tournament to face the Mad Boyz, who drew a bye. Next up, we have a—
(Tamahori
grabs the microphone from the ring announcer and jumps onto the turnbuckle near
the announcer’s table.)
Tamahori:
Cut the music!!
(“Weekend”
stops playing as the fans cheer again.
Tama uses his free hand to take off his mask partway.)
JW:
Looks like Tamahori has something to say…
Tama:
I just have one small, minor question.
I know my partner and I just won, but I have to ask this…
(Tama
looks directly over at the announcer’s table and at Kisara.)
Tama:
What in the world are…(points right at Kisara) **you** doing here?
(Kisara
smirks a little, and then gets out of her seat, circling the ring. She grabs a mic from a nearby table and
looks at Tama.)
Kisara:
Well, my dear Akira—oops, I forgot! It’s Tamahori now! My bad.
(Face
pop as Tama hops off the turnbuckle and puts his mask back on.)
Kisara:
Oh take that stupid-ass mask off, Akira! Everyone knows it’s you! You’re not
fooling anybody!
Tamahori: Who says I was trying to hide my
identity? I use it to protect my
beautiful face during matches.
Kisara:
Since when? Akira, I’ve been with you
at ringside for three and a half years! I’ve seen you do everything without
regard for your face or your body! I’m sure the fans agree with me on this!
(Crowd
cheers.)
Tamahori:
You don’t get it do you, Kisara? The guy you knew as Akira Velaquez, the
greatest damn cruiserweight there is, does NOT exist anymore! I am Tamahori now! I am now one-half of the
OnnaTarashi, the future Premiere Championship Wrestling Tag Team Champions of
the world!
(Tamahori
poses in the middle of the ring, receiving a huge face pop from the crowd.)
Kisara:
Okay, I see now. I come here tonight to
see my sister-in-law, **YOUR** wife, Tama, wrestle.
NC:
And to drool over the OnnaTarashi
AG:
Shush, Neil.
Kisara: And what do I see? My older brother, who TOLD me that he was in Japan on some
business, here wrestling as a pretty boy, and kissing women when he is happily
married! You think Julie’s okay with
that?
Tamahori:
Kisara, obviously I didn’t teach you enough when I let you tag along with me
all those years…
Kisara:
**Tag** along?
Tamahori:
You heard me, **sis**! This, all of
this, is JUST BUSINESS. Nothing more.
Kisara: Just business, huh? I gotcha, bro—I mean
Tamahori. I understand **real**
well.
(Kisara
smirks. Tamahori just looks at her.)
Kisara:
Oh and one more thing, Tama. Get the
hell out of the ring; I have another match to call!
(She
smirks cutely and drops the mic, heading back to her seat at the announcer’s
table. Tama glares at his sister once, then heads backstage. Kamui follows.)
AG:
Well, that was interesting.
NC:
Nice little family feud there.
KV: Oh this ain’t a family feud. It’s just business. And if that’s what he
wants, that’s what he’s gonna get!
JW:
Looks like Kisara has something planned for her big brother. Anyway, let’s go on to our next match, which
is the first match in our PCW Women’s Tournament.
AG:
That’s right, Justin. We have a small
roster of 8 women here in PCW—
KV:
Nine, Alyssa.
AG:
But you don’t wrestle.
KV:
Not yet I don’t. (grins)
AG:
Anyway, these eight women will participate in a tournament to see who our first
Women’s Champion will be. We have
rookies like Jennifer Vanderfeller, experienced wrestlers like Julie Hunter and
Leah Storm, and high-flying international stars like La Tigresa and Sakura
“Sailor X” Kazeno.
NC:
Don’t forget that sultry S&M queen, Dominique Natrix. She can dominate me ANY time!
JW:
Let’s go to the ring.
(The
ring announcer stands in the ring as La Tigresa, the female luchador from
Mexico, crawls around the ring on all fours.)
Ring
Announcer: THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS A
QUARTERFINAL MATCH IN THE PCW WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP TOURNAMENT AND IS SCHEDULED
FOR ONE FALL!! ALREADY IN THE RING,
FROM THE JUNGLE, BY WAY OF MEXICO CITY, HERE IS THE MEXICAN TIGRESS, LA
TIGRESA!!!
(Tigresa
scampers up a turnbuckle and holds up her hands, getting a mixed reaction from
the crowd.)
JW:
La Tigresa, ladies and gents…
AG:
Tigresa is a very unorthodox wrestler indeed.
She spends part of her time during matches on all fours, and then
springs into action on her opponent. Her speed and agility are probably the
best amongst the females in this division.
(Janet
Jackson’s “Control” starts up, getting a cheer from the fans.)
Ring
Announcer: AND HER OPPONENT, FROM CHARLESTON, SOUTH CAROLINA, “SPARKLE” JULIE
HUNTER!!
(Julie
makes her way to the ring, slapping a few hands on her way.)
KV:
I guess she doesn’t use her husband’s last name in the ring. Hell, even her
husband doesn’t even use his name anymore.
AG:
Let it go, Kisara.
NC:
As hot as Julie is, I’m glad she doesn’t use her husband’s name. Now I can wish
she wasn’t married that easier!
KV:
Justin, can I please nail him with a chair?
JW:
No, Kisara, we need our color commentator, even though he can be annoying.
DING,
DING, DING!!
JW:
And we’re ready to start this match!
Tigresa slowly crawling around the ring…
AG:
Like I said, that unorthodox technique.
KV:
Careful, Jules…
(Tigresa
suddenly leaps at Julie and they get into an arm and collar lockup.)
JW:
Tigresa attacking and the two women lock up!
Julie with a knee to the midsection…now she’s twisting Tigresa’s
arm…Tigresa trying to reverse the hold…and a armdrag takedown by La Tigresa!!
(Tigresa
crawls over to Julie and begins slapping at her head.)
KV:
What the—
AG:
She’s keeping up with the whole tigress thing.
It’s like she’s pawing at her head.
JW:
And Hunter’s now up…Tigresa trying to pounce on her, but Julie gets out of the
way! Tigresa into the ropes…and a big
clothesline by Julie!
(Tigresa
takes the hit, but lands on all fours.)
JW:
And she lands on all fours! What agility!
KV:
Guess cats always do land on their feet.
NC:
She’s a very nice pussy indeed.
Girls:
Neil!!
NC:
Couldn’t resist.
JW: Tigresa with a clothesline of her own on
Julie! She goes for a cover, but only
gets a one count!
KV:
Takes more than a clothesline to beat Julie.
JW: La Tigresa on all fours again, looking at
Hunter, who’s back up now… Tigresa leaps at her…and Julie Hunter counters with
a powerslam!! Into a cover…1…2…and La Tigresa gets a shoulder up!
AG:
I think you can only be on the defensive in a match like this. You can’t attack
someone who is in a position like Tigresa is in.
JW:
Tigresa on the prowl again…Hunter turns her around…going for a German
suplex…and Tigresa lands on her feet again! Tigresa going for Hunter now…Julie
ducks under it…
KV:
SPARKLE SHOCK!!! (superkick) Yeah, Julie!!!
JW:
She called it! Hunter with the
cover…1…2…this one’s over!!
DING,
DING DING!!
Ring
Announcer: HERE IS YOUR WINNER…JULIE HUNTER!!
(“Control”
starts up again as the ref raises Julie’s hand.)
JW:
And Julie Hunter advances to the next round…
AG:
There’s someone in the crowd!
(Alyssa
was right. Jennifer Vanderfeller, in
street clothes, hops over the guardrail and slides into the ring.)
NC:
That’s Vanderfeller!!
AG:
What’s she doing here?!
KV:
Look out, Julie!!
(Jennifer
comes up behind Julie and grabs her in a reverse facelock, then drops her in an
inverted DDT.)
JW:
Check Bouncer by Jennifer Vanderfeller!!
KV:
Dammit!!
(Kisara
gets up and grabs her chair. She slides
into the ring and swings at Vanderfeller, who ducks and gets out of the
ring. Kisara yells some choice words at
her as Jennifer makes her way backstage, pointing at Julie, saying something
that sounds like “She’s mine! The belt’s all mine!!”)
NC:
That was unexpected!
AG:
Get this, guys! Vanderfeller’s in action next week against Sakura Kazeno, and
the winner of that match faces Julie in the next round! So we could see this matchup in the next
round!
JW:
Looks like the upstart Jenny Vanderfeller may have bit more than she can chew.
She attacked Julie Hunter, Kisara’s sister-in-law. So now Velaquez may be a factor in this little feud.
NC:
And I’m sure Vanderfeller doesn’t want to be on the business end of that
chair. Kisara is one of the best
females in the business when it comes to swinging chairs.
JW:
Well fans, it’s now time to go back to the heavyweight title tournament. Next up is a match between the behemoth DBG,
Da Big Guy, and “Extreme” Eddie Michels.
Let’s go to the ring.
(“Drop”
by the Pharcyde starts up; fans boo.)
Ring
Announcer: THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS A
FIRST ROUND MATCH IN THE PCW WORLD TITLE TOURNAMENT AND IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE
FALL, INTRODUCING FIRST, BEING ACCOMPANIED TO THE RING BY CHRIS LEE JOHNSON,
FROM DES MOINES, IOWA, WEIGHING IN AT 555 POUNDS, HERE IS DA BIG GUY!!!!!
(As
the lights above the entrance flash to the beat of the music, DBG comes out,
followed by his manager, Chris Lee Johnson, wearing a business suit and
carrying a cane. DBG makes his way to
the ring.)
NC:
Damn, he’s huge.
JW:
At 555 pounds, Da Big Guy is surely the heaviest wrestler in PCW.
NC:
Look at him! He’s leaving footprints on the damn walkway!
(Face
pop as Metallica’s “One” starts up.)
Ring
Announcer: AND HIS OPPONENT, FROM MIAMAI, FLORIDA, WEIGHING 260 POUNDS, HERE IS
“EXTREME” EDDIE MICHELS!!!
(Michels
slowly makes his way to the ring. In
his hand he carries his personalized steel chair, which has “PCW 2 D EXTREME”
spray-painted on it.)
AG: While most of PCW’s roster consists of
wrestlers under the age of thirty, we do have one veteran of the ring, and
there he is. Eddie Michels.
JW:
Michels recently took a break from wrestling to try his hand at broadcasting,
but he was forced back into the ring after being insulted and attacked by
Johnson and his stable in another promotion.
NC:
And I guess Michels is back and he wants to kick some ass!
DING,
DING, DING!!
JW:
And here we go! Arm and collar
lockup…and DBG throws him off! What power!
AG:
Da Big Guy is twice as heavy as Michels and a lot stronger. Michels may need a new game plan to compete
with this behemoth.
NC:
Either that or be flattened by him!
JW: Michels now locking up again with
DBG…Michels turning it into a full nelson now!
He’s trying to go for the submission.
What the--?
(Michels
lifts up DBG briefly and slams him down on the mat butt first.)
JW:
Big full-nelson slam by Eddie Michels!!! Unbelievable!
NC:
Earthquake!!
JW:
Michels with a quick cover now…and Da Big Guy quickly kicks out. DBG back up now and a huge clothesline on
Michels! He’s back up again and a
clothesline with the other arm by DBG!!
Michels up a third time and a boot to the midsection by Da Big Guy!!
(Michels
rolls out of the ring to regroup.)
AG:
Looks like that little slam did much to DBG.
JW: Da Big Guy now out of the ring as the ref
starts the count. DBG advancing on
Michels…Mr. Extreme with a series of kicks to DBG’s midsection… and now some
punches… Michels setting up DBG for the ride…reversal…and Eddie Michels runs
back first into the guardrail!
AG:
Ouch.
NC:
Come on, “Extreme” Eddie! Live up to
your nickname!
JW: DBG now has Michels up…
(DBG
runs toward a ringpost, planning to ram Eddie Michels’ head and back into it.
However, Michels slips out of the hold and pushes DBG into the ringpost
himself!)
JW:
What a counter by Eddie Michels! And
now he kicks the back of DBG’s left knee taking him down!
AG:
Smart move there by Eddie Michels.
JW:
Looks like he’s now gonna look for his steel chair…
(As
Eddie turns around the corner, Chris Lee Johnson, DBG’s manager, whacks him
over the head with his cane!)
JW:
Chris Lee Johnson ambushes him with the cane!!
NC:
It didn’t faze him!!
JW:
Modified Extreme Elbow [flying spinning elbowsmash] on Johnson!! And he’s out
of it!
(Michels
reaches his chair and grabs it, heading back over to where DBG is.)
NC:
Looks like it’s gonna get a little extreme in the Cow Palace!
AG:
DBG is still recovering from hitting that pole…and the shot at his knee.
JW:
Michels setting up that chair…waiting for DBG to get back up.
NC:
Damn the ref’s counting slow!
JW:
If no one gets into the ring before he reaches 20, it’ll be a double
countout! DBG back up now…Michels
running up to the chair…
<CLANG!!>
JW: Springboard Dropkick off the chair by
Michels!! And DBG hit the ringpost again!!
NC: I don’t think he’s gonna remember this match
after it’s over.
DING
DING DING!!!
JW: There’s the bell and the ref’s calling it a
double countout.
(Crowd
cheers wildy as Michels hits DBG in the back with a chair.)
NC:
It’s not over for Michels!!
Ring
Announcer: THE REFEREE HAS RULED THE
MATCH A DOUBLE COUNTOUT!!!
JW: Looks like they’re gonna let him do this,
instead of calling in PCW security. Now
what’s he doing?!
(Michels
reaches under the ring apron and pulls out…)
JW:
A table!! Michels has a table!
NC:
He’s got wood!
AG:
Neil!
NC:
Sorry, another promotion’s gimmick.
JW: And it looks like he’s putting it against
the guardrail. What’s he doing?
NC:
Looks like DBG is gonna be in some extreme pain in a moment!
JW:
Michels has DBG back up…looks like he’s going for a ride…DBG reverses it…
(Michels
is whipped towards the table after the reversal by DBG. As soon as he turns away from the table,
Chris Lee Johnson’s other wrestler, The Beast spears him into the table!!)
JW: OH MY GOD!!!!
NC:
When did the Beast get out here?!
AG:
I don’t know but he just destroyed Eddie Michels’ plans!
JW:
The Beast just speared The King of Extreme through that table! And he looks like he’s out of it!!
(The
Beast and Da Big Guy pick up Chris Lee Johnson, who’s still woozy from the Extreme
Elbow, and head backstage. Medics and
PCW security check up on Michels.)
AG:
What happens now since there was no winner?
JW:
I guess both wrestlers are eliminated and the winner of our next match will
have a bye into the semifinals!
NC:
That’s not fair!
JW:
I know, but that’s the rules.
AG:
By the looks of it, Michels didn’t even care about winning the match! He had at least three chances to get back in
the ring before the countout happened!
JW:
That’s true, Alyssa.
NC: Not like he had a chance to win the belt
anyway. Timberwolf will beat down
everyone!
JW:
You really think so, Neil.
NC:
Damn right!
JW:
We’ll see Timberwolf in action next week. But as for now, let’s go back to the
ring for our final match for the night!
(“Mindfields”
by Prodigy starts up, getting a mixed reaction from the fans.)
Ring
Announcer: THE FOLLOWING CONTEST IS A
FIRST ROUND MATCH IN THE PREMIERE CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE
TOURNAMENT AND IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!
INTRODUCING FIRST, FROM THE CIRCUS, WEIGHING IN AT 280 POUNDS, MAD HAPPY CLOWN!!!
(MHC
makes his way to the ring, wearing a red and blue singlet and a jester’s hat
that is black and white. He also has a
clown nose on his face along with face paint.)
JW:
Another one of our bizarre individuals here in PCW…
NC:
Bizarre does not even begin to describe this freak of nature!
JW:
Guess all those years in the circus did mess up his mind.
(“Narayan”
by Prodigy starts up to a huge face pop.)
Ring
Announcer: AND HIS OPPONENT, BEING ACCOMPANIED TO THE RING BY THE LOVELY
MELISSA, FROM NEW YORK CITY, WEIGHING IN AT 245 POUNDS, HERE IS KERRY RUSH!!!
(As
the drums on “Narayan” kick in, Melissa steps out from behind the curtains,
wearing a fancy looking dress. She
saunters slowly to the ring, getting lots whistles and howls from the male
fans. Then Kerry comes out behind her,
making his way to the ring and high fiving a few fans on his way.)
NC:
Damn, she’s hot.
AG:
She’s also married.
NC:
Like I care.
JW: One could write off Kerry Rush as one of the
wrestlers here that has little chance of winning the PCW World Title when
you’re one of the smaller competitors, but they would be wrong. Kerry’s actually one of the favorites.
NC:
Yeah, but he has to get past this crazy clown first.
AG:
Mad Happy Clown is weird individual.
Like Eddie Michels, he’s one that’ll tend to use chairs and tables and
the like.
DING,
DING, DING!!
JW:
And we’re underway here in the last match of the night as Mad Happy Clown and
Kerry Rush circle around in the ring. MHC going at him and Rush ducks under the
grab and gets the clown in a waistlock.
Back elbow by Mad Happy Clown misses…kick to the midsection by
Rush…going for the Kerry Krusher (Pedigree), but Mad Happy Clown trips him up!
AG:
Kerry almost ended the match quickly there…
JW: Mad Happy Clown has Rush’s legs…and he’s
spinning him around! Giant Swing!
NC:
I’m getting dizzy looking at them!
JW:
And Rush breaks out of it with a spinning bodyscissors takedown! Impressive!
AG: The momentum from that move sent both
wrestlers to opposite sides of the ring.
JW:
Rush slowly working his way back to his feet now, and so is Mad Happy Clown…
Clown over to Kerry now…right hand by MHC…followed by another…and Rush blocks
the third hit…knee to the midsection and a swinging neckbreaker by Kerry Rush!
NC: Come on, Mad Happy Clown! Hurt the pretty boy!
JW: Rush with a cover…and MHC kicks out at
2! MHC back up now…Rush ducks under a
lariat…into the ropes…and Mad Happy Clown nails Kerry with a back body drop! MHC picks up Rush and sends him on a ride…
Kerry ducks under a clothesline…coming back again…cross body—
NC:
Ha ha! He caught him!
JW:
Rush in trouble here…and a fallaway slam by Mad Happy Clown!!
(Kerry
rolls out of the ring to regroup.
Melissa goes over to him to comfort him.)
NC:
Lucky guy. I wonder if she can come
over her if—
AG:
Shut up, Neil.
JW:
Mad Happy Clown now out of the ring and Rush greets him with a snap kick to the
midsection.
NC:
Melissa, get out of the way!
JW:
And she does just that as Rush whips MHC towards the steel steps—reversal…
Kerry onto the steps…and a dropkick by Kerry Rush off the steel steps!
AG:
Smart move by Kerry Rush there. Using his great agility to his advantage.
JW:
Kerry rolling back into the ring now…MHC back up and onto the apron…
(Kerry
springs onto the top rope and dropkicks MHC off the apron.)
JW:
Impressive maneuver by Kerry Rush!
AG:
Once again, Rush’s agility is a good advantage here in this match.
JW:
Mad Happy Clown back into the ring again…knee to the midsection by MHC…and he’s
setting Rush up for a piledriver… and he nailed it!
NC:
Rush’s head bounced off the mat! Ha ha!!
JW: Mad Happy Clown with a cover…1…2…and Rush
gets a shoulder up just in time!
NC:
Melissa looks a little worried out there…maybe I should—
AG:
No, Neil.
JW:
Bodyslam by Mad Happy Clown on Kerry…and he’s now heading to the top…this could
be a splash…
AG:
Mad Happy Clown trying to end it here and advance to the semifinals due to a
bye caused by the events of the last match.
JW:
There goes MHC…RUSH WITH A DROPKICK TO COUNTER!!
NC:
Gah!
JW:
Rush picks up Mad Happy Clown into a fireman’s carry…San Francisco Rush!!
(Neckbreaker out of a fireman’s carry) That could do it!
NC:
Why does he call that the San Francisco Rush when he’s from New York?
AG:
The move is a variation of Tamahori’s former finisher, which was the same move
off the top turnbuckle. Him and Kerry
are really close friends.
NC:
That explains nothing!
JW:
Rush with a cover now…1…2…and a kickout by Mad Happy Clown! How did he get out of that?
NC: Because Kerry Rush sucks!
AG:
How can you hit on Melissa and badmouth Kerry?
NC:
Easy. I just do.
JW:
Both men are back up now. Rush with a
right hand…and another…into the ropes now…going for a flying—NO!! LAST LAUGH!!
(Mandible claw submission) MAD HAPPY CLOWN HAS HIM IN THE LAST LAUGH!!
NC:
Yeah!! Choke him out!!
(Melissa
climbs onto the apron to get the ref’s attention.)
JW:
And Melissa is distracting the ref…
NC:
I don’t like the looks of this…
JW:
LOW BLOW BY KERRY RUSH!! He’s out of the hold!
NC:
Dammit!
AG:
The low blow will break any hold.
(Melissa
hops back to the floor and the ref turns back to the action.)
JW: Rush now hooking Mad Happy Clown’s
arms…Kerry Krusher! That should do it as Rush makes the cover…
NC:
Damn it all…
DING,
DING, DING!!!
(Face
pop as “Narayan” starts up again.)
Ring
Announcer: HERE IS YOUR WINNER, KERRY RUSH!!!
(Melissa
comes into the ring to celebrate with her husband. Mad Happy Clown rolls out of the ring and heads backstage.)
JW:
And Kerry Rush will advance to the semifinals with a bye and—what the hell?
(Kenshiro
Tanaka walks into the ring, kendo stick in hand.)
AG:
What’s Tanaka doing here?!
NC:
Maybe he wants Melissa too. I mean she
is a hottie.
AG:
Shut up, Neil.
JW: Tanaka sneaking behind the Rushes…
(Kenshiro
grabs Kerry’s shoulder, prompting Kerry to turn around. As he does, Tanaka nails him over the head
with the kendo stick. Melissa tries to
get away, but Tanaka nails Melissa as well!
The crowd begins to boo.)
JW:
HE HIT BOTH KERRY AND MELISSA WITH THAT KENDO STICK!!! THAT FIEND!!!
NC:
Damn, I like this kid!!
AG:
But he hit Melissa too!
NC:
So what?! He hit that pretty boy Kerry!!
JW:
And he’s still attacking them!!
(Tanaka
continues his assault by hitting Melissa once more on her leg…HARD, then
repeatedly hitting Kerry with the kendo stick.)
JW:
Why the hell is Kenshiro Tanaka assaulting that couple?!
AG: Unbelievable!
NC: Gah, I love this kid!
JW: We’re outta time, fans! For Alyssa Graham and
Neil Coles, I’m Justin Walker saying goodnight from San Francisco!!
Matches
for next episode:
New
Breed vs. The Tiburones
Seitou
Yousai vs. Steel Eagle
Freight
Train vs. Trickster
Jennifer
Vanderfeller vs. Sakura Kazeno
Sychotic
vs. The Beast
The
Angels vs. Forces of Nature
Timberwolf vs. Akeem X
Ah…the
first show’s out of the way! Hope you
enjoyed it!
As
for the pay-per-view title…to be honest, there really isn’t one! Heh heh.
Next
Fever will have the continuation of all the tournaments, except for the
cruiserweight tourney, which will continue in two weeks.
Why
am I doing this? Because I got bored this summer and no e-feds on the Internet
interested me, so I decided to write my own fanfic showcasing all of my
creations. If any feds want to hire any
wrestlers for their e-feds, they can e-mail me and I’ll check it out (Like any
fed-heads will e-mail me begging to have some pompous heel like Prince Master
in their promotion).
Well,
that’s all I have to say now. See ya next episode!!
Seitou “I debut next week!” Yousai
DISCLAIMER: ALL WRESTLERS ARE CREATIONS OF MINE. ANY SIMILARITIES TO OTHER CHARACTERS OR HUMAN BEINGS, BE THEY LIVING, DEAD, OR CREATED BY SOMEONE ELSE, IS PURELY COINCIDENTAL.
NO
HARM OR INSULT IS MEANT BY ANY JOKES MADE ON ANY SUBJECT IN THIS SHOW. IF SO,
THEN IT’S ALL NEIL COLES’ FAULT.